Eavesdropping at the VRC

Ah Sunday, a day for strolling through the Valley River Center mall with friends, searching for the perfect outfit to wear next weekend. This shopping hub in the Cal Young neighborhood also happens to be the perfect location for slinking around and eavesdropping on private conversations that others probably did not want a stranger to overhear…

Dressing room at American Eagle Outfitters:

“Urgh you’re totally right, thank god you’re here, you’re my radar, you know that? No but like seriously, I would have gone for it with him if you hadn’t come last night and then he would have turned me down. Or oh my god maybe he hasn’t come out of the closet yet so then he would’ve just gone along with it and then he would have been thinking about other guys the whole time. I really need you to be there every time I go out so I stop going for the gay guys.”

Dressing Room at Forever 21:

Blonde Girl #1: “Are you guys going to wear heels?”

Brunette: “No, I don’t think so, I can’t even walk in flats when I’m drunk.”

Blonde Girl #2: “Wait, you’re not wearing heels, gross. What else would you wear?”

Brunette: “I don’t know, I was thinking cute sandals or something.”

Blonde Girl #2: “Ew, no you can’t go to the dance in sandals. Who does that?

Brunette: “I can’t?”

Blonde Girl #2: “Uh, no. Josh will never want to dance with a girl in sandals, guys only like girls in heels.”

Brunette: “Oh, okay, I guess I”ll wear heels then.”

Macy’s Shoe Department:

Saleswoman #1: “Oh my god, what an adorable dog.”

Blonde shopper: “Oh thanks, his name’s Benny. He’s super friendly.”

Saleswoman #1: (To dog) “Hey there little guy, aren’t you just the cutest?”

(To shopper): “Let me know if you need anything.”

Blonde shopper: “Thanks, will do!”

Once the shopper is out of earshot…

Saleswoman #1: “Urgh, it is so gross when people bring their dogs shopping. It’s like, hello, I don’t want your smelly dog whose been rolling in God knows what all over my Steve Maddens.”

Saleswoman #2: “I know, it’s like, come on, this is not New York City or L.A. or something like that.”

Saleswoman #1: Yeah, stop trying to be all Sex and the City here.”

(Saleswomen giggle hysterically)

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